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If anyone knows of anymore of these floating around the boards, paste em here. Also, feel free to make your own up as well.
"10 And on the 8th day, after the world and the skies and the seas and the cosmos had been expelled from His most holiest of Bowels, man did rejoice. In his exuberance and joy, man did create such awesomeness to celebrate their Lord, in the form of fireworks and Muppets. But yea, the Lord did shun them and cast a baleful eye upon them. He rent their cities unto pillars of salt, and damned their tongues to speak differently to punish them for their arrogance. And low, so did the nations of the world separate and man was divided from his brother.
11 But the Lord twas a forgiving Lord, and from the Heavens, to all man, he bestowed upon them the gift of Venom and Banana Bread. "Drink this" he spoke "for it is the blood of my blood. Eat this, for it is the body of my body. Also, both are tasty and yummy, and that Venom let me create the world and all the Heavens in but 7 days...do you have any idea just how big that shit is? Epic! that's how big." And man did rejoice again, in all his tongues.
- the scribe Gojiratoho
And lo, He said unto thee; "Dumpeth thine bitch so that thou mayest pursue women of a more pleasurable nature".
Yet Mahoney dared question the The Kerouac in saying; "Havest thou a wife most unpleasurable thineself? Divine Kerouac, how must I live to thine accords when You thineself dost follow down the path of misery?"
Kerouac responded with love and divinity; "Thou sayest things thou doth not understand, for it is I who will provide the answer. For you see, a child hath just been born, and she shall be cloaked in linens most regaled for their costuming qualities. As this child maketh the conversion to womanhood, so shall I dumpeth mine own Delilah, and pursueth the woman-child for mine own.
Now relax thine worries, and turn thine focus to Keanu, for I predict salvation in his deeds. Watch as he toucheth-down."
So it is written, so it shall be banked.
- the prophet Jeffro
"10 And on the 8th day, after the world and the skies and the seas and the cosmos had been expelled from His most holiest of Bowels, man did rejoice. In his exuberance and joy, man did create such awesomeness to celebrate their Lord, in the form of fireworks and Muppets. But yea, the Lord did shun them and cast a baleful eye upon them. He rent their cities unto pillars of salt, and damned their tongues to speak differently to punish them for their arrogance. And low, so did the nations of the world separate and man was divided from his brother.
11 But the Lord twas a forgiving Lord, and from the Heavens, to all man, he bestowed upon them the gift of Venom and Banana Bread. "Drink this" he spoke "for it is the blood of my blood. Eat this, for it is the body of my body. Also, both are tasty and yummy, and that Venom let me create the world and all the Heavens in but 7 days...do you have any idea just how big that shit is? Epic! that's how big." And man did rejoice again, in all his tongues.
- the scribe Gojiratoho
And lo, He said unto thee; "Dumpeth thine bitch so that thou mayest pursue women of a more pleasurable nature".
Yet Mahoney dared question the The Kerouac in saying; "Havest thou a wife most unpleasurable thineself? Divine Kerouac, how must I live to thine accords when You thineself dost follow down the path of misery?"
Kerouac responded with love and divinity; "Thou sayest things thou doth not understand, for it is I who will provide the answer. For you see, a child hath just been born, and she shall be cloaked in linens most regaled for their costuming qualities. As this child maketh the conversion to womanhood, so shall I dumpeth mine own Delilah, and pursueth the woman-child for mine own.
Now relax thine worries, and turn thine focus to Keanu, for I predict salvation in his deeds. Watch as he toucheth-down."
So it is written, so it shall be banked.
- the prophet Jeffro
