The Funniest Converstations/Moments you've ever had.

2007. The day of Wizard World Chicago, 4 hours before the con.

Some friends of mine are heading up to the con from Ohio, and I'm on the phone with them on getting to the con.

Chris: "Pete, mapquest says take 94 to Rosemont."
Peter: "Sure, if you want to see the city before you head to the con, but they are doing a shit load of construction there. 294 is faster, you have to play a few tolls though."
Chris: "Okay, yeah we are in Indiana right now and just passing into IL. Wait PETE, the sign says I-294 to Wisconsin!!"
Peter: ". .........Chris...you are not going to LIGHTSPEED into Wisconsin just by crossing the border of IN/IL. Just stay on the rode and get off on River Rd."



Next...

Guess you have to live in IL/IN to get that...

While working at the Church of Scientology, we had an event in which we were all required to wear tags with our names on them. I was working the front desk, and two guys from upstairs came down and started hanging out and chatting. The following conversation transpired.

Guy 1: (pointing at Guy 2's name tag) His name is Thomas.
Guy 2: I work on the second floor.
Guy 1: He works upstairs from you!
Guy 2: Yeah, I think you've seen me before.
Me: ...get the hell away from my desk.

^
While working there...Did you ever hear something late at night? You know, some kind of trouble?... some kind of fight?


Ok...I'm done.

Tomer Soiker wrote:Guess you have to live in IL/IN to get that...

Not really...

The person was afraid to take an exit, simply because it had another state on the sign. He was panicking for nothing, and Pete corrected him.

Nothing really IL/IN-Exclusive about that...

Using my hands to talk while speaking with Gemwolf and smaking some lady right in the face as she walked by. It was funny to me after I realized I did not hurt her.

Denim wrote:Using my hands to talk while speaking with Gemwolf and smaking some lady right in the face as she walked by. It was funny to me after I realized I did not hurt her.

Christmas time at Toys R Us.

After handing out a bunch of unwanted candy canes, I find K-Whack doing parallel bar dips on one of the register counters.

As I ask, "What the hell are you doing?", I get back, far too excitedly, "Did I tell you I have a sugar problem??"

Denim wrote:Using my hands to talk while speaking with Gemwolf and smaking some lady right in the face as she walked by. It was funny to me after I realized I did not hurt her.

I accidentally whacked Tripper in the chest doing that when we were in Florida.

And, yes, accidentally. It was the back of my hand. If I was trying to cop a feel, it would've been palm...

^ You say that like you're still trying to convince Trips.

Tomer Soiker wrote:Guess you have to live in IL/IN to get that...

I live in Illinois and even I didn't find that funny. Guess you have to live up near Chicago to get that.

Back in 8th grade I was with my friends in the school yard talking and whatnot. Then I didn't notice that I lost them, and suddenly I had something to say to one of them who was much taller than me. I thought he was right behind me, so I turned to him and was embarrassed to find myself talking to some guy learning a year ahead of me hugging his girlfriend. They laughed at me and I just turned back and walked as fast as I could. Luckily, they didn't know my name but obviously I still rmember that moment.

Couple of years ago when I still used my "Spidey_82" username there was a comics convention in Tel-Aviv. I didn't know in person many people I interacted with on the web. There was an Admin of a local forum I never met before in person and I thought it'll be nice to say "Hi" to her during the con. Without any clue how she looks in real life, I guessed she'll be sitting in a table of an organization she was part of and I thought this girl who was there is the one I'm looking for. I went there and said "Hi, I"m Spidey_82!" She replied: "Huh... is that some kind of group thing I'm supposed to be familiar with?" Turned out I was wrong, but didn't say anything nor explained my intention (to this day). Of course, since then I've met the person I was looking for and we're sorta hanging out in the same circles, same as the other girl.

I've told this one before on another thread, but here it is again. It may make one of my bosses sound like a jerk, but he's not. He's just a perv sometimes...

Anyway, he had the hots for the company lawyer and always had to say something about her when we were only guys around. One day he returns from outside and says: "I just had a thought; **** is pregnant so you can just c-- inside." It was funny and embarrassing both at the same time.

supervenom wrote:

Tomer Soiker wrote:Guess you have to live in IL/IN to get that...

I live in Illinois and even I didn't find that funny. Guess you have to live up near Chicago to get that.

It's not region-specific!! I don't get what's so hard to understand about that...

That joke'll never play in Poughkipsee, kiddo. (chews cigar)

I went to a baseball game with my husband and Deion Sanders walked out onto the field..

Me: Is that Deion Sanders that plays football?
Husband: Yes
Me: THE DEION SANDERS?
Husband: Yes
Me: Why is he playing baseball I thought he played football.
Husband: He now plays baseball
Me: But he can't do both..can he?
Husband: yes he can
Me: Are you sure that is the Deion Sanders that plays football?
Husband: yes
During this whole converstion everyone sitting under us has turned to look at us during this conversation..there was a lot of head shaking.

Another one- when we went to see Star Trek at the theater.

Me: I didn't know Spock was half-human.
Husband: Yes he is
Me: Did you know he was half human?
Husband: Yes I did
Me: Why didn't you tell me?
Husband: Because I thought you knew..everyone knows.
Me: Well I didn't
Husband: You need to stop talking.

Spaced4SimonPegg wrote:
Husband: You need to stop talking.

Winner, winner, chicken dinner.

Amanda: I asked my Mom what a pearl necklace was today, because you and my brother wouldnt tell me.
Andrew: You asked your Mom?!

potatojoe wrote:Amanda: I asked my Mom what a pearl necklace was today, because you and my brother wouldnt tell me.
Andrew: You asked your Mom?!

What did her mom say?!

"It's when a guy does his business around a woman's neck"

Wow, such candor!

potatojoe wrote:"It's when a guy does his business around a woman's neck"

Why would you want to poop on someone's neck!?

Silent K wrote:

potatojoe wrote:"It's when a guy does his business around a woman's neck"

Why would you want to poop on someone's neck!?

Why do men want to give a girl/guy a golden shower

Silent K wrote:

potatojoe wrote:"It's when a guy does his business around a woman's neck"

Why would you want to poop on someone's neck!?

potatojoe wrote:Amanda: I asked my Mom what a pearl necklace was today, because you and my brother wouldnt tell me.
Andrew: You asked your Mom?!

Hilarious.

Reminds me of when I was a freshmen in high school. I was telling a joke with the word c*ck in it to this dude. He doesn't laugh, but instead asks, "What is a c*ck?" I said, "I'm not telling you." So he turns to the first guy walking in through the door and asks, "What is a c*ck?" The guy looks @ me with the WTF look. Still cracks me up to this day.