Ask an Esbat!

BlueMaxx wrote:

Esbat wrote:
Nips are made up of tissue that is meant to contract, this is usually triggered by the release of Oxytocin (sexual arousal or breast feeding) or simply the body is protecting itself by shutting its blood supply off from external lower temperatures.

Chicks got nice warm fat in their boobs so thus the skin is more sensitive to temperature dips, while dudes tough it out. Some bearers of Moobs also suffer from cold-nip-sensitivity due to moobage.

You totally looked that up. Cheater!

Dear you dirty muthafuckah,

As part of my American Education in which I am not "officially" a "Doctor", I took a course in Human Sexuality. And being a "boob man" I got *ALL* my questions answered by the instructor and the book.

Up yours,

Dr. Esbat effin' Lichtenstein, Esq.

PS- You made me cry my own tears.

Dear Esbat,
Are you my mother?

FroZen wrote:Dear Doctor,


Long time reader, I'm a huge fan.I mean a REALLY big fan!! I'm starting to think that no one really appreciates you the way I do. And you never return my calls or even send nice thank you notes for the cat hearts I keep shipping to you via U.P.S. Why don't you love me? I've been sitting outside you're house at night watching you walk past you're windows. I'm still holding the pair of boxers I took from you're hamper. If I can't have you.....no one will. Why are lady bugs red with black spots?

Your biggest fan in the world.
you will be mine.

FroZen.

Dear Passive Aggressive Closet Case,

By the time you read this, I'll be servicing your sister. I'm sorry for doing this but, OK, I'm really not. I know this might comes as a bit of a answered prayer to you - especially because you're an emotional cripple. But I'm sorry – I just need hot sex with someone who isn't a human potato sack. I think you're totally keen, but I don't think we're right for each other. First of all, we're not compatible. You're a Scientologist, and I'm sensitive. You like leather harnesses, you eat endangered species, and enjoy defrauding the elderly, and I don't like two of these things. Your favorite movie is I Spit on Your Grave, and your favorite band is C&C Music Factory. Do you even know what my favorite movie or band is? I once asked you what color my eyes are and you said "Nuke me some fucking hash browns!". Anyway, I want to date other people. But you know what? I still want to be dead to you. We can totally forget the other is alive . We had some good times, or so it looks on the videotape (even though I'm passed out) . But please, don't get all John Wayne Gacy like last time. That means no spiteful genital tattoos. And look - I won't even make an issue out of the $37,229 you owe me, or the fact that you threw bleach on my face. So take care of yourself - and enjoy prison.

Stop Calling Me,

Dr. Esbat "Love" Von Lichtenstein, Esq.

P.S. Lady Bug questions are for entomoligists to answer they're the ones with the big white coats about to take you away.

shining knight wrote:Dear mr esbat....

Who knows what lurks in the boogers of men?

Dave,

I'm sorry, Dave. I'm afraid I can't do that.

Joshua wrote:Dear Esbat,
Are you my mother?

Joshizzua,

No, but I *am* in her from time to time.

Kisses (from your mom),

Dr. Esbat "009 and a half" von Lichtenstein, Esq.

Well the answer is quite clearly the shadow nose

shining knight wrote:Well the answer is quite clearly the shadow nose

I'm sorry I was distracted by your avatar.

I bet you were

Hey Esbat..

Did ya get that thing I sencha?

Esbat's doctoring is mostly comments of sexing our moms and sisters.

Is there another reason to become a doctor? I mean really!